January 11th, 2009 by Green Griffin
Another year another… well, another something, that is at least mostly certain. Then again that is always the fun part of ringing in a new year isn’t it? Not really knowing what, if anything happened. The feeling is only beaten by the knowledge that often accompanies it, the knowledge that pretty well anything could have happened. The possibilities, as it is, are practically endless. Keeping this in mind, and before I reached a level of intoxication that left me little more than a large infant I made a decision, I would take notes.
Now, I have done this before, and it generally has come out with a fun filled account of swearing at strangers and excreting, um, stuff from various places on your body. Pissing and vomiting that is, I do not so much condone the other one in public… then there is the dawning that there are actually many other things I could have been talking about. Wow, that was long winded wasn’t it? Let’s move on shall we.
So, here is the basic premise, its new years, I am going to bring a note pad along with me for the night and take notes of what’s going on. Sounds simple right? For most people, yes, but as I have stated I planned on losing any semblance of motor function, and I have marginally legible hand writing to begin with. As you can now imagine, this recount is not going to be easily transcribed.
To set the scene let’s just say right now I am sitting in a bach only recently cleaned of bottles, dirt, and glasses, pants are being worn by most, which as you shall see is kind of surprising….
And now if that wasn’t a big enough waste of your time, let’s see if I can muster something else together.
I figure I will take down the notes here pretty much as I wrote them, but will expand on stuff where necessary… I will also unexpand(?) on stuff that is truly horrible. I can’t have people thinking less of me now can I?
12.27 – The first beer of the day gets interrupted by a phone call from my lovely mother, after a rousing conversation I have gained only one piece of new information, and as it turns out it was some of the best news I could have gotten – mum and dad were not returning to the beach, this meant the section was ours and ours alone – maybe I should have filed this under obvious foreshadowing, but because I was starting to drink and it was very sunny I filed it in ‘driving directions in Alaska’, that is to say – information I would never remember, or pay attention to. Oops.
12.34 – It is only guys who can stay awake apparently. The girls are fast asleep scattered around the lounge, and Dunc is not far from being the same. Was the previous night really that big? Scattered memory flashes seem to indicate that it was. Hmmm… (really some good stories could be told about that one too, such as Dunc arriving home, after being lost, without his jandals, or boxers)
12.40 – The Modest Mouse song ‘the good times are killing me’ comes on. This song has always resonated with me for some reason. I do not see this as a positive thing. Before I can slip into a period of questioning my life choices Will joins me with a beer; that was a close call.
12.44 – My first beer of the day finished. That seemed to take longer than usual. I decide this is not actually a bad thing, there is a big night ahead of us and starting to fast could end, um, unpleasantly. That and the fact the fridge is quite far away.
12.52 – A bug lands on my thumb, rather than brush it away I look closely at it and realise there is a smaller version of the same bug attached to its ass. I am confused by this. The bug flies off and I decide I just helped it give birth – seems I am a midwife amongst other things
1.23 – two beers down now, that only took… an hour… wow. Other people are now awake, that’s nice. As are paddling pools – I hadn’t mentioned that yet had I? Most of this story takes place in a paddling pool in the sun in the middle of my lawn.
1.35 – I have apparently decided to turn the note pad sideways for the remained of this day, good story huh? This way I must look more professional or something – hastily I throw together a cover story for why I am taking notes, it will come in handy later, surely.
Kieran finally arrives, that was only an hour and a half after he said he would. Late much? (yes, I hate myself for that too, thanks)
2.07 – Piss trip with K-fresh (we are not really sure where that came from, but is apparently what I call him now… I’m not so original). That is not to say actual pissing. Drink more I should, and if I can, listen to some Pink Floyd – I get these urges from time to time.
We arrive home and Rachael is supremely eager to say she had a sandwich, I pay it the attention it needs, which is to say, it made it in here didn’t it?
2.26 – Mmmmmm salsa. Mmmmmm mojito. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm – that is a direct quote from the book. None of it was actually said out loud, but it does cover what I was eating and drinking at the time. I seem to have liked it.
2.35 – Tina & Rach leave to visit Tina’s cousin (actually not her cousin, but that is not my concern) leaving just guys sitting around in a paddling pool drinking. Guess that means we have an orgy now right? Wait, what?!
2.51 – After a lengthy discussion we decide that Manukau is probably the fattest city in New Zealand. We then take turns trying to point out we were not intentionally being racist when coming to that decision.
2.53 – While moving to get a beer I am pretty sure Will just tried to fuck Kieran. Maybe I should have pointed out the orgy thing was a joke. Maybe.
3 – The topic of conversation has moved on from fat cities, after briefly talking about Ben Elton books we are now talking about reality TV shows. I do remember parts of this conversation being very amusing, but apparently not enough for me to actually write down details. Curious. Remember when the guy on Survivor Outback fell face first into a fire? Yeah, good times.
3.03 – At some point we came to the conclusion that tomorrow Tina is becoming born again, this information will apparently be vital for jokes later on.
3.08 – Fist can be a verb you know. “It’s a doing word” – Will
3.15 – The discussion has moved on to strip clubs, apparently I have some good stories on this topic, like the cunt bourbon story, or the time I was naked and fell on my head then got tips. … Moving on…
3.21 – Inaction. That is the entire note I took at this time, but just look at it and think, what was I talking about exactly?
Give up?
I swung a bucket around while trying to move water from one location to another. Completely unintentionally it went upside down but nothing poured out. I considered this me failing to pour water out, but also said “Physics in action”. I then decided that it is weird that ‘in action’ is doing stuff, while ‘inaction’ is the opposite. See, that’s something right? Will and I then used the two terms repeatedly in some kind of sick word game. It was funny, shut up.
(I also noticed that I had an entry at 1.23 and 3.21 – small things eh?)
3.23 – Kieran gets some gummy snakes (see the joke already?) from his bag. I ask for one and then open my mouth. K proceeds to hit me in the face with it in a manner not unsimilar to, stuff… Mmmm sexy snakes.
3.24 – As with most drinking conversations with a group of guys in their early 20s we head down the road of having children. It is decided that Red Thursday needs to have children so we can continue to the legacy of greatness. It seems Tina will need to start pumping out kids.
4 – The girls come back, by this stage I am drunk enough to know I am quite drunk, but obviously not so drunk that I don’t. Follow?
We start a cricket game, this cant end badly.
4.10 – As a bit of background I should point out that this morning I woke up with a lot of pain in my shoulder. I don’t know what I did last night, but it was apparently something that hurt me, a lot. I tried to forget this during the day by doing the obvious thing – taking lots of pain killers. I decided I
would not stop this when I started drinking. Hey, at least I wasn’t using the hypodermic needles from two days ago – Yes, I am quite the tease like that.
Anyway, after batting and getting out I wormed my way into the bowling order. Is this one obvious too? My first delivery and I am done for the day, my shoulder had in no subtle way told me to give up on moving and just keep drinking. I take the advice, and a few more pills (though did try bowling again pretty soon after, same result).
4.16 – More pants off. I had alluded to that hadn’t I? Pants off parties are the best.
4.18 – Will announces that we have permission to kill him. This doesn’t make sense, but I make sure I note it down – this will hold up in court right? There could have been provisions tied to it, but no one is really sure, we heard what we needed and stopped listening.
4.21 – Rach – “There were teenage girls at Tinas cousins place. Marsh, you should have come”
Someone else suggests I could have justifiably replied “Cunt faces” seems a little vulgar for me though.
4.23 – I have now put an ice pack on my shoulder. Seems it was about here where I went in for my second one ball bowling spell.
4.26 – Rach makes a comment that I have noted down as “Big box Marsh”, showing the classiness I alluded to before I come back with “Yeah, it’s like throwing a hot dog down a hall way”. Continuing the theme something happens in regard to Tina and swallowing, though a few seconds later she was pretty clearly spitting. It all left me a little confused and a lot aroused. (I have since been informed it was Rach spitting at this time, still not quite sure what was going on)
At this same time I also drew a picture of our current situation. This basically had a circle for the pool with two circles in it showing Rach and Tina and four X’s around the outside showing the guys. It is labelled ‘Hot’, too right.
4.34 – 3-man has begun. Seems the night should quite quickly turn into something else about now. Craftily we have a body board in the pool and are using it as a table. Nothing will stand in the way of us getting drunk.
4.38 – Visitors arrive, the people the girls had previously visited. More players for the game. They don’t quite know what they are in for.
(This actually turned out awesomely as two of the three people who arrived were a couple who sat next to each other. Not fully knowing the game it seemed the guy thought the girl was picking on him by rolling lots of 7s (making him drink), so he kept nominating her for drinks, making a drunken cycle of fun times)
4.55 – I have finished all my beers and am onto my bottle of SoCo. Another one for the ever growing ‘obvious foreshadowing’ folder.
4.59 – Apparently I love 3-man, my note pad simply has “I love this game” written in large letters. Being the clever person I am I also drew the NBA logo.
5 – I love this note pad.
5.06 – Tina, virgin, comedy gold.
5.20 – I have decided Tinas family (not sure about that) are awesome. I have also decided that Rach’s new nick name of Ray should be made to stick, I see no problem with this…
5.30 – SoCo – I seem to be labouring this point a little. It is a great drink though. I am also quite pleased with the music, though I would say that wouldn’t I. Faith no more comes on, have not listened to them in some time.
5.40 – Apparently it is now that it dawns on me that the pool is a potential drowning hazard. I should probably add more stress on the potential part of that.
6.12 – Improbably I am inside making a salad, now that one you didn’t see coming right? Duncan notes that the celery is quite floppy, loose if you will. He helpfully points out it is not quite as loose as Tina though. Why is it that when you make those jokes and the person it is in relation to is not around you feel like a terrible person? Well, maybe you do, the jury is out.
6.12 (again?) – Anna, answer your damn phone. I think I was trying to agree with a happy new year text by ringing her back. In hindsight it was probably a blessing she didn’t answer the phone. Though I did still manage to make many phone calls over the night, even to Australia.
6.20 – Food pool. Curiously by the end of the night it did kind of look that way. Yes, we are clean people.
6.21 – Happy birthday Anna. This takes up a whole page for some reason. It doesn’t even almost make any sense as far as I can tell. None at all.
6.40 – My note pad has posed a simple question – Pants? The one and only correct answer is, of course, no.
6.40.46 – Apparently I am that accurate with my time keeping. I don’t think I can argue with that being as the note is “GRRRRRRRRRRR”
6.40.59 – “MMMMMMMMM” – There is actually potential that this is a scribble and not letters at all. There is also potential I am functionally retarded, but at this point it is all semantics (and yes, that doesn’t make sense, I don’t care)
6.50 – Stuff
6.51 – What?
6.52 – Wet hook up.
(this is one of my favourite pages so far)
7 – Cricket.
Something.
Top phone
Who ringing?
(it would seem my mental degeneration is kicking into overdrive at this point. Then again making sense was never my real motivating factor was it?)
7.15 – Though the page is not really legible, I know what it was intended to say and that is “Pants? Amateur. Armchair.” I know it should say this as I do remember it and for some reason found that really funny. I also know I tried to text it to someone, but because I could not figure out how to spell amateur at the time I went for novice instead, totally killing the joke. Well, the fact I actually wrote ‘notice’ didn’t help it any either (Pants? Notice. Pants off? Armchair – you figure it out)
7.19 – Another baffling one, it says “C Rack @”. I am not sure exactly, but my impression of this message is that I just saw Tinas boobs.
7.33 – Drunking. Phone. Pool. This was the first of several mentions of the pool where I inexplicably crossed the l, making the word read poot. Have I pointed out handwriting is not my best mate yet?
7.33.03 – CUNTS! Just a simple page filling word. OK, there was a little picture too. Hmmm…
The next page has another picture of the pool, though this time all the little shapes are inside the big circle.
7.50 – No pants. Wet. Pool(t) great. Seriously, this was one of the nicest weather days I have been in for a long time and I got to spend it drinking in a paddling pool, sometimes things are just right in the world.
8.16 – Don’t write thoughts
8.16.08 – Cold. Pants? Nah
It is times like this I kind of wish I could expand or explain things beyond saying “I was really drunk” but I can’t.
or can I?
8.16.032 (what??) – Evidently ’slut’ translates directly to ‘lesbian’, who knew?
Now that is a story, with a lot of good photos. Let’s just say there were girls and hooking up. Mmmhmmm
8.16.57 – Everyone in. Right. We managed to cram 6 or more people in the paddling pool at various times. The wetness was great.
8.17 – If it wasn’t clear that near nakedness was the order of the day K-Fresh and I debate the merits of getting out junk out. Better judgement did prevail.
8.38 – Apparently there were some kind of dramas in relation to a phone, or phone call or text. I am really not sure, it doesn’t ring any bells and doesn’t seem all that likely to begin with. I think it is safe to say that there was a phone, and that is about it.
8.39 – Put on pants? Give up Alcohol? Not bloody likely.
I wonder if someone had questioned me about that or something?
9.10 – Cold pool? Hmmmm
9.10 – more – that was a good story?
(I don’t actually know if that is what it said. I am pretty sure in fact it said nothing even remotely like that, but I am making the executive decision to say that’s what it is now.)
9.20 – Tina “Don’t force it in Marsh”
I am making another executive decision and not even almost explaining that situation either.
9.46 – Moving is overrated, fuck that. This statement is so unsurprising I do not know why I bothered to note it down in the first place. On the other hand I am pretty well in the running to win any and every stating the obvious contest that ever happens.
9.47 – Ring, ring, ring. The other half of the page has something written on it, but I am not sure what. I mean, clearly it is ink similar to the first half, but, the patterns the ink makes means almost nothing to me. The best attempt I can muster is – Go drunk call got to A!
10.09 – Church.
Kez rules, like, lots. Funny shit. Much so.
Why are they dancing on me? I know we are drunk but who needs [word missing]
At this point we had come back inside and the music had taken a decidedly worse turn (IMO), I was sitting down drinking and had everyone else dancing around/on me. It was an unusual turn of events, but it does make sense of why the writing is so horrible. Well, it was almost a good excuse right?
10.10 – The page just says ‘Rhyme Book’ Kieran has named my note pad and I like it. I like it so much in fact that I promptly forget all about it and only now can recall the event ever happening.
10.28 – I have written down “suitcase tumbler” with a little picture of a U with a line across it. I meant it to look like a drinking glass. This started one of the stranger parts of the night for me. Everyone had left to find fun elsewhere, which though was possible still seemed weird to me as there was a liquor ban in place, so without a destination we were just stopping drinking. Not content to do that I tried to drink faster, hence I decided to have some suitcases. The problem I found was that we didn’t have shot glasses (which is amazing considering how many I, ah, own). Ever the ingenious one I just poured my ’shots’ in small drinking glasses. Yes, this is going to end well. So, I drink half the lime juice and then went to drink the ’shot’ of SoCo, unfortunately the glass was so full I had no means of fitting all the alcohol in my mouth, not even close really, I had filled it up quite a bit. So basically I had three goes at drinking the SoCo and then finally drank the rest of the lime, which there was also ample of. It was not such a pleasant situation really.
I then got my shit together and was about to leave to catch up with the others (technically I was planning on going to the other side of town on a visiting mission, but they didn’t know that). As I round the corner of the house Tina comes running up, quite worn out by the look of things. I managed to hear her say something about alcohol before she was inside. I followed, quite intrigued by it all and got inside to see her filling a 1.5 litre bottle with vodka and coke. I thought it excessive, but assumed she was going to take it somewhere to drink (despite the liquor ban, neither of us really thought this as bad an idea as it really was).
Anyway, she makes her drink, takes a sip, then puts it in the fridge while saying “it’s a trap for someone who wants coke tomorrow” we then both left again.
So, that was weird then wasn’t it? The correct answer is of course yes, but, at the time it seemed to be a logical and calm thing to do. Isn’t alcohol great.
10.40 – The next page reads ‘Will shave. Fucktard. The work ones & mind’ I don’t know what that means exactly but I sure as hell can explain the situation it came up in.
Tina and I walked down the road from my place and then found Duncan on the side of the road. He informs us that the rest of our friends in the house we are in front of. He also mentions Will is getting his head shaved. Rather than sorting through the situation I just decided that I didn’t know who Will was and was going to say so to anyone who asked, and more so anyone who didn’t ask too.
Events at the house were a little confusing, I do remember a Jager bomb and a shot of something I am pretty sure was absinthe – it burnt. I also remember Will coming up to me and asking to talk, then going outside and having him explain that he got his head shaved (duh), and he did it because they said they were raising money for cancer. Call me heartless if you will, but who the fuck was ever going to believe that story? We are raising money for cancer by shaving random drunk people’s heads on New Year’s eve in Whangamata in a small house on a not particularly important road. What?? I pretty quickly decide I don’t want to be with Will right about now, so I walk back inside. The situation still does confuse me quite a bit, but I had more important things to do, like getting across town and back in under an hour.
10.41 – This is kinda back in time now you have read all of that (which you have?) but it just says jager. Yeah, good times.
10.42 – Jager bombs – bomb. A jager-bomb-bomb? what? Yeah, apparently we were getting alcohol here, who knew. The next day I would also find out we could have got drugs there too. What nice (?) people.
(I also find out that was the whole reason we went to the house in the first place)
10.48 – Whip it, whip it good.
10.49 – No Will, no! – this one doesn’t really need an explanation does it.
10.50 – this note still means nothing to me, it just reads ‘X 2′ I assume this was meant to be ‘times two’ why I would write that down however…
10.51 – Will no happy. Hair. Scam – again, I’ll just leave that one.
10.53 – We are dancing in a random house for no apparently reason. Least they are playing the doors.
10.57 – We finally leave the random house. That was one of the most confusing 20 minute periods of the night, that is saying quite a bit. Little did I know there was more.
10.58 – As I was leaving a person in the house noticed I was writing and asked me why. Thinking very quickly I told her I am a sociology major and I am doing research into the drinking habits and social behaviours of 20-26 year olds. I backed this up with using lecturers names from the University, and also saying “Hey, we funded that guy to do the study on bogan social habits, I am doing something very similar but with a different social group”. Though she did point out she was not in the age range, so I did not need to talk to her, she did buy the story and thought it was quite a novel idea. Apparently lots of people drink at this time of year. She also wrote a page in my note pad “Nana Jayne 
love, peace & sunshine – Tinny house” weirdly I didn’t catch on to the drugs until the next day. As I have pointed out, people drink at this time of year.
11 – Sociology (see above)
11.02 – Work walk wulk. Pretty sure it was meant to be the word walk repeated three times. I am quite drunk by this stage. Quite very very.
11.06 – Bush golf. No, not quite a new sport, or anything sexy either, we just needed to cross the golf course and I believe I fell in some bushes too. I knew the way to go, but had we not been following some other people there is a strong chance we would still be on that golf course.
11.12 – Run. I left my friends when we reached the far side of the golf course. I had decided this was the right time to go and find my other friend. I ran for quite a while, and got many a comment from people around, it was a weird thing to see I guess.
11.14 – Stop. Not right there. Spin guide. I had not arrived yet, but apparently was a little lost so I didn’t need to continue running. Either that or I did keep running because…
11.16 – mdstmgjoistpo,aipvospkg, – OK, so it doesn’t say that, but the letters are all smushed on top and into each other, so it may have been close. I am pretty sure this is why a person who can’t write and is drunk should not try and write while running. Go figure?
11.15 – tish cant. Don’t know what it means, don’t know how I went back in time. But, that is it.
11.16 – Chartwell. I believe this is the name of the road near where I was going. That only took me 15 minutes running to go a distance of what is actually around about 1km.
11.22 – I am at Lee’s house now. It is a weird place to be. Not in any bad way, I was just shocked to show up and find there was basically just her and a handful of ten year old kids. Is this really my life? Did I just run across town to hang out with young children? In the time it takes me to throw back a KGB (quite literally seconds) the place had cleared out and it was just the two of us. A little perplexed I jump at the opportunity to go to the surf club. I grab another drink first and finish it before leaving the section.
11.41 – I can’t make out the full comment but I believe the word ‘root’ and ’sister’ are key. I think it is probably safer if I just leave that one alone and point out that as we walked to the surf club not only did Lee go out of her way to avoid walking past police officers (??) she also randomly swore at some douchbag who either looked at her, or said something near her. I thought it was freaking awesome.
11.44 – Public toilet. Makes sense? Surf club.
11.48 – Toilet over. Surf club (I think we have gathered that now). Why wet shoes??
What just happened there? I was waiting outside public toilets for Lee, I don’t think much more is needed. Though as I was doing so Dunc rang me, told me to wave my hands around (I did, made sense right?) and hey presto Tina ran out from somewhere and hugged me. I have been trying to recreate this event over and over since, but apparently it is not some magical cue.
11.53 – I realise, and decide to note down that there are only 7 minutes left for Tina to slam someone.
12.05 – After the countdown me and Duncan realise they did not play Auld Lang Syne but instead jumped right in to some Aerosmith. This does not please us one bit, so we sing it ourselves.
[Note: The use of the word sing in the previous sentence in no way should be taken to mean that we had rhythm, could stay in tune, or in fact knew the words]
Two other things happened at this time – Tina and Rach said something to us, and then sprinted off (we didn’t understand why, but also didn’t do anything about it); and Duncan dropped his ring. Thinking quickly Duncan told this to me and I, thinking equally as quick, dived to the ground. Pushing peoples legs out of the way (big crowd, all starting to move places) yelling something about a contact lens. I did find the ring, and I did enjoy the experience. Sweet times.
12.29 – As we are walking home a girl and her mum wished us a happy new year from the front of their property. Needing no more invitation we walked over and had a chat. I quickly noticed they were not going to be supplying alcohol, and it was highly unlikely any kind of sexual activity would spur from the conversation either so I basically zoned out – though at the same time I think I was active in the conversation (huh?) I know they did ask about the note pad and I carefully retold my story from earlier.
Speaking about earlier we were almost back at that house…
12.35 – We arrive back at Nana Jaynes place. There is no one home. We (it is just Dunc, Kieran and myself) look at the pile of hair on the ground and laugh, then two girls (women) come out and ask us what’s going on. We tell them the story about our friend getting his head shaved, though we had invented a mystery 9 year old boy who did it. They quickly grow tired of our conversations (they think we a liars). As we leave I say something about Nana Jayne and they both snap to alertness. I start telling them all I know about her (basically nothing at all really, not even a terrible description) and that we had a great conversation. To prove my point I show them my note pad. We still leave right away, but maybe on slightly better terms?
12.37 – Kieran is a gay. I don’t know what spurred this on, which is quite unfortunate, it seems funny. It is especially good because of the comment earlier where I cannot seem to stop praising Kieran. I think I may be a little bi-polar. Or drunk. [Hmmm, I may have just insulted all bi-polar people, or all drunk people. Did I just assume that a mental illness is actually just people being drunk? I don’t know what’s going on.
12.42 – Fuck you all, time for champers. Earlier I had put a bottle of cheap sparkling white wine (so, kind of champers) in the fridge, I figure around 1am is a good time to open so I do. This of course is all back at our place. Tina and Rach had beaten us back, and cooked up some bacon and sausages’, Will had appeared just as we arrived and Dunc was not keen to drink. Looks like this is just me and [the freshly outed] K-Fresh.
12.53 – Hot meat bread. I take it I had a sausage too. I also take it me and Kieran are gonna play some tetris. Yeah, weird a little.
12.55 – I recall another time of sitting around drunk in the wee hours of the morning. We had watched some of the show Dr. 90210 and learned of a surgical technique – LVR, laser vaginal rejuvenation. It is suggested this could help Tinas born-again-ness? What? Huh?
1am – Champers some more, this bottle seems to be getting the better of us. I throw the top away, that seems to solve most alcoholic problems. Tina is currently on my phone to her parents, Dunc yells from the other side of the yard “Swallow you bitch”. Thanks for the input Duncan.
The next page is a simple stick figure drawing with the text ‘Rach – the portrait’ underneath. I am also an artist it seems.
1.11 – Tetris.
1.16 – Level 1
1.32 – Tetris? No, Tessie!!
Seems I was enjoying myself a lot then too. Tessie is a reference to a Dropkick Murphys song, which is a reference to baseball.
1.40 – Sleep? No, champers first. At least I have my priorities right, but sleep would be a fun thing. Kieran notes that he is going to throw up. I take the bottle away from him but he protests. I give it back and he continues to drink. This is the time of night real men are born.
1.52 – Black velvet band (another Droppers song) is playing and the champers is done. What an effort. Great night though, so it’s all worthwhile.
1.54 – Bed time.
And there ya go, one of the most memorable New Years I have had, of course, this is helping with all the memories, well, and all the sweet photos that were taken.
I woke up later (about 8ish?) not feeling that bad, I proceeded to breathalyse myself, apparently I am in absolutely no shape to drive. The plus side is leaving the section seemed quite an unlikely thing, and as I sit here now writing this, hours after I began, I can safely say the closest thing I did to leave the section today was sitting in a paddling pool, so, not very close at all.
Posted in Events | 2 Comments »
July 4th, 2008 by Green Griffin
Last night. Red Thursday. A night I do not remember a lot of.
I’ll start at the start. Or at least I’ll start not at the end, you know, as most good stories do (well, The Usual Suspects is a great story, and it starts near the end. As does Fight Club actually, and Memento now I think of it. Maybe I should actually start near the end then recap everything else after [before] that point? Yeah. that could be fun.)
I am in my room. I have been here many times before. But have I really? It is clean, it is dark. My pants are on the ground, my phone is in my hand.
Did I just get here?
Was I going somewhere? Calling someone?
I look at my recent messages – I told Rockstar I have her ID, interesting. I remember having it, it’s in my jeans.
I search the pockets, the ID is not there. Did I lose a lost ID? I call Ben, maybe he knows – granted, its 4.30am, but still, this is apparently important.
Ben was sleeping, maybe. He does have the ID, that is some weight off my mind – but now the bigger problem, why am I home?
Oh, it’s 4.30, that makes sense. But how did everyone else get home? I know I walked, I always walk, but what of the girls? When did I last see them? My mind races back as far as it can go. Apparently that is only up to the phone call to Ben. Damn Alcohol! (no, I take that back). Surely I saw them safely into a taxi, or at least safely somewhere. Ben wouldn’t have just walked home with me otherwise. Right?
There is one way to solve this, texts. Two of them, too Pocket-Spoon, she will say it’s all fine and that will solve everything.
No reply. Well, when being indirect doesn’t work you make phone calls. Lots of them. No answer. I am freaking out about this for some reason. For some other reason I get over it and pass out. So is my life.
Suddenly I realise that all of this, has got something to do with a girl named Marla Singer.
No, wait. Back up. Let me start earlier. For six months, I couldn’t sleep.
I couldn’t sleep.
OK, now I have my Fight Club moment out of the way I can carry on.
It was just going 6 o’clock. Dinner was ready but I had other plans. I raced [walked] up to the liquor store and brought a box of Fuse. I give my ID to the girl at the counter knowing full well she knows who I am and has ID’d me many times. She reminds me of this fact and together with the owner we laugh. I could be wrong but I think she wants me. Scratch that, I am wrong, it’s a nice thought though. As I race [walk] back home I am amused and disturbed by the fact that the liquor store staff are so well acquainted with me.
After dinner I retire [go] to my room and have a beer while playing around on the net. I don’t yet understand the full plan for the evening and assume people will text me with my required activities.
No one texts. I have another beer.
Being proactive as I am I text Ben and soon find I am at his house. All is well (except for the fact I now realise we didn’t watch zen master – does it still count as a red thursday without it?).
Four more drinks down and Ben and I depart. We have had wonderful conversations filled with laughter and deep and meaningful messages [massages?].
Red Thursday, a day like no other (except for being so similar to many other days). Good turn out, lots of red, happiness fills me.
Events tend to blur here, I know as much as I didn’t walk to town. Ben gave me a ride? Thanks Ben, it is much appreciated. I don’t know where we parked.
I wasn’t going to jump the line but I saw John and he called me up.
Hey, when you are this popular what can you do?
I don’t remember 101. My bank account does. I am going to step out and say I am a good friend. It is much more preferable to the alternative – you know, an alcoholic. I can see I was still getting grandfather claused in, this pleases me.
Bakehouse also saw my business. Weird. I don’t so much like bakehouse. I burped, I had garlic bread, I am happy about this (you didn’t need to know that did you?).
I remember a girl called Sarah. Hannahs friend. Have I met her before? I wish I was not so bad with names. She tells me to find Hannah, I seem to accept this as a reasonable mission.
Wow, I have confused the timeline, that was at 11.24. Why was I so drunk at that time?
I make a Chasing Amy reference though text. It is not understood, that makes sense, no one has seen that movie. Oh well.
That was actually one of the funnier parts of the night. I was writing a text message, looked down and then realised I didn’t know who or why I was texting so finished the messages with a song reference. I mean, how could that possibly ever go wrong or lead to dramas?
I know I was just getting you hooked, but I think I have basically told as much of the story that I remember or need to tell. Plus this leaves you wanting a sequel? I don’t know, I am no book-writer-guy.
Bring on Saturday, Red Thursday didn’t finish me off (Is that a dirty reference? It is up to you at this point! (was that one?))
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June 30th, 2008 by Scarlet Avenger
The other night I was having the sweetest dream. I was at some apartment complex with a mate and we were sitting round the pool with some chicks who were hot. I mean seriously hot. Hot to the point that if you were watching a movie that these chicks starred in, you would be so powerless against their beauty that you would have no choice but to sneak off after the movie for some sexy times with yourself.
Anyways, so we were sitting round the pool with these tastey chicks – nothing strange so far given we do that all the time. Then the hottest chick leads me back to my room and begins to suck on my lollipop!!! This was fantastic!!! No other suck off could ever come close to this – real or otherwise. Next thing I know, most of beertuesday is at the door pushing their way in which obviously puts a dampen on the situation. So of course I try to push them out the door – blows before bros and all that. But they wouldn’t fucken leave!!! I am fairly certain that every single member of beertuesday had a hand in preventing this chick from finishing what she started. I specifically remember Green Griffin and White Warrior sitting on the bed with their laptops seemingly oblivious to the situation they had interrupted. Then my leggy blonde left the room. Gone from my crotch forever. So just like that it had changed from what could have been a fucken sweet wet dream into a dream about a dozen or so semi-homosexual guys jumping around on my bed….. This is the reason why I currently hate BeerTuesday….. you are all a bunch of CUNTS!!!!! STAY THE FUCK OUT OF MY SWEET FANTASIES….. and if you must intrude – at least finish me off you inconsiderate fucks!!!…………. that is all I have to say on the matter……
S.A.
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May 14th, 2008 by Green Griffin
So before I get to the amazing events of Saturday night that are completely impossibly to recall, I think it is best to preface with what I had been doing before hand.
Since the previous Friday I had drunk 6/8 nights, this was all coming to a head this weekend with the aforementioned Saturday night intending to be the summit of drunken greatness (greatness?).
Last Thursday night was a post-Uni-Games party. Being the clever sods we are, we also arranged a pre-post-Uni-Games party; honestly, are you surprised?
I was unfortunately at work in the afternoon, but after a message at 3pm informing me drinking had begun I decided I would no longer stay till 5.
Before 4 had rolled around I had rolled out.
Planning ahead I had a change of clothes with me, which once applied (you can apply clothes right?) I wandered [read: went as fast as not running would allow] to the liquor store. Thinking I had around 3 hours of drinking before arriving at the bar for the real party I purchased 8 cruiser (and cruiser like) beverages and headed to the pre-post-party.
Upon arrival I took party in the mandatory funnel on entry; pineapple cruisers go through a funnel like, um, a really good simile!! (Oh yeah, I went there). I reall should have filed the funnel event under “Obvious Foreshadowing” (thanks Tucker), but my excitement and anticipation for the night ahead meant I was not quite thinking properly.
About 30 minutes after my arrival I realised I had underestimated my drinking ability [read: urge] and borrowed a bicycle to head to a store and get some more drinks. An additional 4 should hold me over; we are going to a place with $2 drinks after all.
Exact events of the rest of the pre-party escape me, but I finished my dozen, and had done at least 4 as funnels. It is safe to say I probably shouldn’t have driven anywhere. At about 7 we started the walk to town, yet halfway down the first road a friend pulled over in his ute and started yelling at us. With very little to no provocation many of us piled into and onto the ute and were magically transported to town.
From this point on the story all becomes hearsay and bank account details. I do; however, remember at least four things:
- As soon as we arrived I brought the maximum allowed amount of drinks (who wouldn’t?)
- I played pool with a friend from my team. I don’t know why they picked me, as other people wanted to play and everyone (including myself) mentioned that I was in no state to play. We beat these other people (twice?)
- A friend of mine was flying out of the country the next morning (at like 4am, the guy who picked us up). He was outside at one point telling me (or others?) that the people he was going with were not impressed he was out and wasted. I decided to be a good friend and fix everything for him. Using a trick I had learnt/ed from SDC the Saturday before I took his phone and rang one of the people.
After the initial answer thinking I was him and saying I had to go home, I explained that I had not seen him in about 40 minutes. I went on to use the excuse that he had given me his phone and vanished. She was not fully impressed. I don’t know if I just hung up or gave the phone back. Probably not important.
- And the final thing I know is that I brought a kebab before walking home.
Apparently there are more things that happened than that:
-According to my bank account I spent around $100 on alcohol for the night (it was $2 and $3 drinks!!! Unless I was buying other things?)
- I am told I did some sweet dancing. Well, some dancing. Well, I kept trying to spin a girl and things like that but possibly was failing miserably.
- I was given a bar tab meant for our hockey team. Freaking out that I was going to spend it all without telling anyone else I started yelling for the host of the pre-post-party (guy in my team, and probably as drunk as me) as I figured he would be responsible with it. He was, drinks were brought.
- With the many drinks I brought, several were given away, or potentially stolen by team members (I am speaking about you Mr Thumb-Smasher). The aforementioned is a reference to someone being told “Green Griffin just brought me this drink. He doesn’t know it though”.
Another friend told me I gave him multiple half drinks as I was too drunk to be finishing them. I would then go and buy myself fresh ones as I wouldn’t know where my drink had gone.
- Finally, according to photographic evidence I was intoxicated to the point that making an even moderately photogenic face was beyond me.
Oh well, it happens.
Now for the ubiquitous (really that isn’t quite the right word for this, but it’s OK) plug.
The bar we were in is Bar101, the new greatest bar in Hamilton. There is nothing bad about this bar at all, especially as (as I discovered the next night) you can get $3 drinks all the time with a student ID.
Go there, go there now.
[Another aside about Bar101, on Thursday I must have made friends with one of the bouncers, as when I walked in on Friday he started chatting away with me and talking about events of the previous night. I thought it was nice, but had no idea at all who he was or how he knew me. Yes, Thursday was a very, very good evening (so was Friday and Saturday actually, maybe I will write about them now)]
-GG
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May 7th, 2008 by Green Griffin
As my write up of the first concert was so average, and because the second concert was identical I decided I would do a much better write up of this one, just to be nice (or maybe mean) to all those who missed out.
I will start by saying the second concert was even better than the first, and that I am beyond impressed with the Foo Fighters right now. I can’t wait for another tour to see how, and if, they can top this one. It was amazing.
Tuesday started off with me trying to write an essay. As boredom and excitement took over, so did the urge to shot people and stuff like that; so I started watching NK play GTA:IV.
Hours passed and before I knew it Beer Tuesday had come and gone and we were on the way to the concert.
The two opening acts were Kaki King, and The Sky Bombers.
Only caught a small bit of Kaki, but in what we saw we could tell she was an amazing guitar player, we were then pretty gutted that we had missed most of her set (both nights).
The Sky Bombers on the other hand were full of energy, but, it didn’t seem a lot else. Sure, this is probably harsh as I am comparing them to the Foo Fighters, but I didn’t really rate them at all. The second night was a little better, as I had heard all their songs by now and got caught in the tunes a little bit more. I must say however, when you introduce a song saying “This song is about my mum, it’s called She’s always complaining” you maybe should reconsider things.
Who knows?
The break between the Bombers and the Foos was pretty short, so before we knew it (well, the rest of the crowd, we had a pretty good idea based on the previous night) Chris, Nate, Taylor and Dave were out on stage. As per the previous night for the first two songs they were also joined by Drew Hester, Jessy Greene, Pat Smear and Rami Jaffee (who all made many other appearances during the show).
The set list for the two nights was the same, with the only changes coming in the encore, where in the second night they added three additional songs (DOA, No Way Back, and Generator).
From the moment they hit the stage the crowd went mental. A constant cheer as the band stood around and Dave ran out the runway and out on the sides of the stage, saluting the crowd and getting everyone pumped up.
They then cut right into Let it Die, which was followed without a break by The Pretender, they then continued to play right into Times Like These and then Breakout. A powerful intro indeed. They crowd, as New Zealand does for the Foo Fighters was going nuts the whole time. Cheering loudly, singing proudly (yeah, I don’t think that actually works either, it’s OK thought).
After the first 4 songs the band stopped for a moment for Dave to have a few words. Talk about how good the last night was, and how much better this one would be. He came out with the idea that modern bands with their make-up and crying and junk, play for an hour and fifteen minutes, and that it is pathetic. As such he announced they would play at least two hours, but as the cheer died down from that he suggested that they will just play until the audience tells them to leave. This idea was met with an even bigger cheer.
They then jumped into another series of songs (I forget exact order here) which included Cheer Up, Boys (Your Make-up Is Running); Learn to Fly; Staked Actors; and This is a Call.
Two of these songs had extended interludes.
During This is a Call Dave went on a rampage, running too all corners of the stage, melting some faces with his mad guitar skills (I couldn’t help myself there, sorry). While Staked Actors began with a guitar duel (bad choice of word) between Dave and Chris, and paused in the middle for an extended drum solo. It seemed during this solo that the rest of the band were taking a little break, as they all left the stage and weren’t to be seen.
The next portion of the set was where things really got awesome (well, it was equally as awesome as the rest of it, but the whole show was at such a new level of awesomeness it was hard to decide where on the awesome scale any one song or segment belonged).
Can everyone say acoustic?
Yes, Dave, followed shortly by the rest of the band walked to the end of the central runway where they were met with a second circular stage that had descended from the ceiling. The stage was preset with drums, pianos, percussion segment and microphones. It was essentially a small take on the Skin and Bones set.
Amazing was about to happen.
Starting with Skin and Bones the pace of the whole concert changed (moderately). They then played (in some order) My Hero; Cold Day in the Sun; But, Honestly; and Marigold. The big band also got introduced which tonight allowed for a sweet violin romp with Jessy, and, of course, the obligatory triangle solo with Drew Hester (who later we are sure was hitting on Jessy)
There was of course more chatting from Dave here, including a portion where he told us to “shut the fuck up”, and questioned how they were meant to play music with the crowd that loud. There was also banter back and forth with Taylor before Cold Day in the Sun.
The previous night this banter had included a joke which wasn’t really heard, but mentioned something about all the convicts from England actually coming to New Zealand (Taylor), and a rebuttal saying that actually, it was all the hot women, (Dave) as there was a big group right in the front. Tonight; however, Dave warned that no jokes should be told, and teased the crowd with not knowing what they were talking about.
Once these songs were done the band left once again and Dave had another talk with the audience. This time Dave spoke about the Beaconsfield Miners, and how much that story had changed his view on their music. He also explained that it was because of a drunken promise to one of the miners that the song actually made the album.
Clearly this song was then played. Dave re-introduced Kaki King, who he rates as the greatest guitar player ever; and quite a looker (potentially).
After this Dave went right into Everlong, which as expected drew amazing roars from the crowd. Dave played along until the end of the song when he raced back to the main stage, and right up beside Taylor on the drums. However, as Dave tried to get back on the stage his foot was caught in a wire and he fell straight down on his face.
(From where I was it looked like he broke his ankle at first as his shoe came off slightly, allowing for a weird bend)
Dave recovered like a pro and after throwing his guitar up over his shoulder (neck snapped off when it hit the ground) carried on singing. The pro roadies rushed out and got him a new guitar without missing a beat and the song finished as well as it ever has. Dave then quipped that it was perfect that it (the fall) happened now at the end of the tour (end of this leg, they play again at the end of this month and Germany).
They then rushed into Monkey Wrench, which as expected also went off. Then to finish the main part of the set they played All my Life, which included the backing screens turning red, recreating the awesomeness of the video (and the infamous (??) photo of their silhouettes’ on a red back ground where it looks like one guy doesn’t have a head).
The crowd roar was insatiable with the band off the stage, and as per the previous night (and most concerts on this tour I am told) the video screens soon came back on with Dave showing the set list and holding up a finger stating one more song. The crowd went off again. Taylor then came on screen and also indicated one more song, but after holding a hand to his ear changed this to two more songs. Dave concurred, but then Taylor came back and like he wanted it kept a secret held up three fingers. Good times to come.
The band came back on stage and after Dave explained he often likes opening an encore with a softer song they played Big Me with Jessy coming back in to help with the vocals. This was followed with Long Road to Ruin, which also went off.
Actually, Long Road to Ruin was quite unique this night, as it was Chris’ birthday.
Halfway through the song a random guy ran out onto stage and was just standing around behind Dave. This caused the band to stop and Dave explain to the guy that he can’t just run up there while they are playing. Unless…
Yeah, he was a male stripper and proceeded to get some clothes off and dance around for Chris. Highly amusing. We then sang happy Birthday and Dave asked the crowd what they wanted next.
A small section at the front was chanting for DOA, and Dave obliged by playing it. They then went straight into No Way Back, which had a huge amount of audience singing involved. Finally they added Generator for good measure.
Those of you counting could note that is 5 songs in the 3 song encore; and as all good things must come to an end Dave thanked the crowd once more, created a cheer for the roadies, and then finished everything up with Best of You.
So, we left and on our walk home realised that as good as the first night was, they topped it in the second. More songs will do that I guess. It was also interesting to note that all the little speeches and anecdotes changed between the two shows, even ones that were essentially the same (Beaconsfield miners story) – then again, this shouldn’t have come as a surprise, they are pros after all.
All up this has been the greatest 5 day period of my life, topped off by two of the best concerts I may ever see. The random couple who I spoke to this morning (because I had a Foos shirt on) summed it up nicely when they said “Nothing else is ever going to be the same. How are we going to get a concert better than that? I might have to give up on going to them if they are all going to be huge disappointments when compared to the Foo Fighters.”
(It should be noted I wrote all of this, while I have an essay due in two days that I have yet to start or even really have a good look at – Foo Fighters > Passing University)
- GG
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May 6th, 2008 by Green Griffin
So this day had high expectations coming in. The Foo Fighters are one of my favourite bands, and arguably one of the greatest bands of all time (or at least our generation). They also put on awesome live shows (as I have seen them several times already), so I was expecting an great night.
The day started pretty early, woken up at 6.30 by SA having a show. I then proceeded to get up once SDC and NK had gone to work, and sat around watching some cartoons while surfing the net. Before I knew it, 11.30 had come around and I hopped the bus to town to meet up with SDC for lunch. Little did I know my cousin was meeting us there as well with his army buddies.
So I arrive and the boys had just finished ordering their meals and had a round of beers on the table, I quickly got my own beer and ordered a dozen buffalo wings (Degree is an awesome place, and these wings are amazing – I had been crazing them since I left Auckland). So drinking took place, and then SDC arrived and got his own beer and ordered food. Drinking and eating occurred and SDC headed back to work (three beers down at lunch – nice). I, being a student who had decided to take several days off, hung around and continued to drink many more pints with the army boys.
This was a highly positive idea on my behalf, as these army guys were good freaking quality. I have never had so many laughs about weird conversations and events at lunchtime before. Just for a taster, one of the guys explained to us that when he was younger (at primary school) he beat off to Officer Callahan from Police Academy. Police Academy the Animated show that is. The reason that is worth noting is because this guy was quite loud – and it was 1pm in a public place. Yeah, it was heading to be that kind of day…
Continued drinking till about 5, then came back home and before long we were down at the concert. Originally I had been a little disappointed because I was seated, but once I found my seats (stage right, not to far back in either direction) I realised that the view was awesome, and that I was not going to be disappointed.
The concert started with Let it Die, followed up by The Pretender, and then still without saying a word they went into Times Like These and Breakout. After that point I kind of forget the order the songs were played, but the set list looked something like this
· Best Of You
· Cold Day In The Sun
· The Pretender
· Let It Die
· Long Road To Ruin
· Cheer Up, Boys (Your Make-Up Is Running)
· But, Honestly
· Times like these
· Breakout
· Staked actors
· Monkey wrench
· Everlong
· Breakout
· Big Me
· All my life
· Ballard for the Beaconfield Miners
· Marigold
· This is a call
· Learn to fly
· My hero
· Long road to ruin
· Skin and Bones
Clearly an awesome set.
But not only was it sweet music, there was a good portion in the middle where a second stage came down from the roof and they played a bunch of acoustic songs, similar to Skin and Bone (the DvD). This was extra awesome because it also allowed for Dave to do a whole bunch of talking, which is always entertaining.
So, they played for a few hours, and it was the best few hours of my short little life. Afterwards I just could not stop smiling.
I am very excited about seeing them again tonight.
The only bad thing I have to say is about Vector. As everyone has said time and time again, the sound in Vector is not really great. It was noticeable again last night. Not very bad, but there were bits of the show I felt that Vector was letting them down.
Oh well, I was seeing the Foos twice in two days, I am probably not going to complain.
- GG
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May 6th, 2008 by Green Griffin
Sunday started like oh so many do: not wanting to wake up.
Eventually I motivated myself to leave my room, and then I proceeded with the next common Auckland Sunday activity: sitting around with BT guys, playing on the Internet, and talking about junk.
I can’t completely recall what went on during Sunday. We watched a few movies on the media centre: Gone Baby Gone and The Bank Job, and also watched a new episode of the office. I don’t really know what else happened but we passed the time till 7 when we started watching actual TV. We also ordered pizza at some point. Who knows of these days. As the evening drew on and we realised there was nothing on TV everyone went to sleep. I on the other hand had no work the next day so I stayed up watching Cobra on TV (until Sky died due to the weather), and Jumper on my laptop.
Bed happened, but sleep didn’t. I was ever so excited about Monday – Foo Fighters day.
- GG
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May 6th, 2008 by Green Griffin
Ah Saturday. This was a special day, I don’t often have such big hangovers after Friday night’s these days. I am not complaining at all, as Friday was excellent, but it did make Saturday not so nice.
I got up at about 9, and knowing what was ahead of me for the day I quickly drank a cruiser. Yes, that’s right, 9am and I was drinking a vodka cruiser while surfing the internet from bed. I have truly reached a high point in my life.
White Warrior sent me a text message not long after advising that I should get up as he was picking me up shortly. After struggling out of bed I had a shower and then proceeded to pack my bag. WW showed up and as we drove away informed me that there was going to be some firewood to be picked up. As I was hungover (though on my way back to getting drunk), I did not think about this – I was going to be carrying firewood around.
After a short stop in Matangi we were on our way to Parongia (yeah, all over the show way to get to Auckland). I decided this was a good point of the day to start drinking properly, so cracked into the Raddlers I had left from last night.
After the firewood was all loaded we were on the road again – this time actually heading to Auckland. I continued to drink, more combatively than ever. I was still feeling a little uneasy from Friday, the lack of sleep and large amount of alcohol were apparently catching up with me.
The drive was uneventful, except for the fact anywhere we stopped I noticed people staring at me. I couldn’t figure it out at the time. I guessed it was because I was clearly drinking and it was still before midday. Later I realised it was probably because I was wearing a bright pink, ah, lightish red shirt. Huntly was interesting…
We arrived in Auckland, unloaded the firewood (I more just sat around drinking), and then headed to the guys flat to proceed with the party. Upon arrival we discovered there was actually a Westie Theme to the night, this made my lightish red shirt even less appropriate. Oh well, I was drunk, I didn’t care.
So, everyone continued drinking heavily, and later on the fun and games started. I guess the best way to put this is the truth. We killed a baby [doll]. One of the guests had brought along their baby [doll] and at some point it was decided people should try and hurt it as much as possible. One of the first things was stealing the baby and throwing it in the microwave. Soon after this a knife had been brought out and it was placed in the baby’s face. We then thought the baby should be cremated, so put it in the oven.
Realising the danger of fire that existed we just cut the baby’s head off and stuck it on top of a pepper grinder – well, obviously right?
Sure, it is probably pretty sick, but it was highly amusing at the time. Excellent.
Eventually people started to leave and the party wound down. All up it was an awesome evening, and it will also be very sad to see Blue Streak leave (terrible sentence. Then again, a lot of this has been).
- GG
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May 6th, 2008 by Green Griffin
Friday was “a day just like any other day, no work, and no play. I knew that paradise was some other place and I’ll get there, another way…”
OK, so that was just a stupid reason to put some Bad Religion lyrics in the blog. Get over it.
Anyway, Friday was my Mums birthday, so, after doing the lovely son things in the morning I took off to Uni as I had to go to work. I stayed there for a few hours then went and did a very important tax presentation. This went really well, so to celebrate, I went back to work. A few hours later the wine was flowing at work, and all was well in the world. I hung around for a few drinks before remembering I had a real party to get to that night, so could do much more drinking there.
I got home and opened a beer. The next steps involved showering and listening to music while I waited for 830 to come so I could go and get drunk. Like clockwork (hahahahahahha!!!!) 830 rolled around and as did I do Duncans.
I really can’t talk up drinking with my hockey friends enough. Sure there are times I pass it up because of other engagements, but when I do drink with them it is always really good times. This night was no exception.
I will admit that I don’t recall a lot of the happenings. This was proven more when I saw some photos of the night that I had no recollection of at all. I am quite the photo slut though, I can’t be expected to remember every shot I was in.
After several many drinks there I somehow got a ride to town, where we all quickly proceeded to Bar 101, the best new bar in Hamilton.
Things go blank again here. I do however remember carrying Geoff into the bar as he was far to drunk to be let in alone. I also know I did buy some drinks there – though I have not seen a charge for these yet, so, I don’t know what happened there.
A few hours and a kebab later I was back at home. Much worse for wear, but in a very happy state.
I do so love alcohol.
The best bit was that I knew this was just the start of an epic weekend.
- Green Griffin
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February 18th, 2008 by Sweet Dr Chocolate
I have not done the whole blog thing for a while, so after great weekend it seemed like a good thing to write about.
Friday night was large. It began with after-work drinking, and eventually ending up in a the Northern Steamship where drinking continued. At one point I lost Rock Paper Scissors and ended up having to walk to the next closest bar (200m or so) to by a couple of packets of cigarettes. The confusing this about this is that I don’t smoke, and I am not sure why I was involved in the RPS in the beginning. Upon the purchase of these cigarettes, I decided for revenge I would open both packets, move a bunch of the cigarettes around, so that the package appeared to be tampered with, which technical I guess they were. When I returned to the group I handed them the packets and told the smokers that I had removed one cigarette from each packet, put it down my pants and did a little dance. Both of the smokers believed me, and tried to pick which cigarette looked like it had been removed… and then decided to smoke the packets anyway. It occurred to me that they were actually not too concerned about smoking my nether-regions, so I told them I didn’t actually put anything in my pants. In hindsight I kind of wish that I had, who knows sweaty ball-sacks may even taste good when mixed with tar and carbon monoxide and all of the other ingredients, maybe that is one of the things that Russel Crowe’s character tried in The Insider, maybe that is why he had an ethical problem in the first place.
The next step of the night was the Casino, this was great, I ended up sitting down at a hot table, and winning a lot of money, as did the American guy who was on the table at the same time. They couldn’t calm down the winnings, even when the automatic shuffler mysteriously jammed and they needed to hold us up and change out the ten of diamonds, this did not interrupt the table karma. It got to the point where we were openly mocking pit bosses with comments like “exactly how much do I need to win before I get some free drinks” (you do not actually automatically get free drinks just for gambling in New Zealand casinos), and when cashing out “if only I could get a free drink I would probably sit here for another hour and keep playing”, still no free drinks. We then had celebratory drinks with the American guy, and reminisced about how much greater Vegas is, he went to college about 3 hours away from Las Vegas so had plenty to share.
Friday night wrapped up about 3am, with a return to our place where Green Griffin, Cream Crusader and I stayed up to 5am watching Skin and Bones, good times.
Saturday morning, surprisingly not feeling too bad. Not a lot planned for the day aside from watching the Rookie v Sophomore game for the NBA’s all star Weekend. This has to be my least favourite event from the All Star weekend, however I was optimistic, given the level of talent from the past two drafts. Yet again this game turned out to be disappointment. The problem is that this game has no intensity, and there is no defence played at any stage, it is like watching 18 Vince Carters. The highlight of the game is usually when the game is over and everyone clears out and it turns into a dunk contest, and even this didn’t happen this year. Also Yi looked so out of place in the game he has no place in this game (I agree he is one of the top rookies, but he looks so out of place), almost like Yao has no place in the All Star game, the Chinese players just look like they have no idea what is going on in this game, they do realise that the game is an exhibition right? while we are on the topic of players who didn’t belong Daniel Gibson shot 11 threes and won the MVP, what is the point of this? the game is about dunks and layups, how do you have 20 three point attempts, this is not the Euro league, sure in the regular season when Lebron clears the defense and leaves you with open shots you can take the threes, but in a game with no defence to start with, why are you shooting these threes?
How does this get fixed? I have always been against the idea of a International vs USA game, only because almost 80% of the players in the league are from the states, so it is not really representative, also in an international game, an international team can beat a US team, but this is because the US team is an all star team, and the international team is actually a team, if both teams were all star teams then the US team should win comfortably. However imagine if on Friday night there was an international vs US players game, using players who were not in the actual all star game. Think of the potential teams, the only international players in this years All star game were Yao, Dirk, and Nash. So that could leave an international team including Andrea Bargnani, Andrew Bogut, Pau Gasol, Manu Ginobili, Tony Parker, Leandro Barbosa, Loul Deng, Andrei Kirilenko, Jose Calderon, Andris Beadrins, Mehemet Okur, Hedo Turkoglu, Yi (considering you need a mix of players and positions), I am sure I am missing people too. That team should beat the next best 12 US players who were not in the All Star game, and they would all have something to prove, the international players, and the US Born All star snubs.
Then consider there are players like Dirk who played like he should not have been in the actual All Star game, there is a lot of depth in this game, and it will only get better as more players from overseas come into the league. This would also increase the international emphasis in the NBA, which David Stern clearly wants to do if he wants to have a European division (more on this), and still showcase the young players, as a lot of them would still make this game.
Speaking of this European Division idea, I think it is a great idea, both for increasing the international popularity of the game, and because of the potential size of the markets revenue wise. However adding 5 teams to the NBA will ruin the league, so you would need to move 5 teams. If you moved New Orleans, Memphis, Seattle (OK City), New Jersey, Mikwaukee to London, Paris, Madrid, Amsederam, and either Berlin, it would be fantastic. Also you would need to move a team to Vegas to balance out the East having Amsterdam in their conference, so move the Kings out there. Travel will be a factor, but not much of a factor, it is not like these teams are flying on commercial airlines. The NBA wouldn’t need as many minor leagues if they had teams in Europe, there would be way less need for totally inferior leagues like the ABA, CBA, WNBA and the D League. When Europe already has an inferior league.
That evening White Warrior and I want to the first Waikato game of the Super 14, an always good local derby against Auckland at Eden park. It was a good time, unfortunately for Waikato it was too early in the season, so there were not many Waikato fans there, because it is February and it is hard to get into the mood for Rugby season. There was a good Auckland crowd, surprising because generally Aucklanders don’t show up for things. Overall I thought it was much closer than the final score showed, however I have been told that it did not look good on TV for Waikato. We snuck out of the stadium 10 minutes early to avoid the abuse from Auckland fans, and to beat traffic (I cannot figure out how that stadium is going to host World Cup games, it is going to be an embarrassment for New Zealand).
On a related note, I am now ready for Rugby season. Last week I thought it was too soon, and still summer, but now that I have been to a game, and watched about 3 more I am ready to get into this. I went into the season thinking that Auckland and Canterbury would be New Zealands best teams with Waikato not far out in Third. I still think this, because Wellington clearly will not be good, and Otago will win a game somewhere, just hard to see where.
Later that evening was Blue Streaks Birthday at the Ivory Lounge (there was a dinner first, but I was at the game). It was fun if uneventful, just drinking, which is always fun. After the bar closed we all returned to our place for more drinking, the problem was we only had spirits, and had no mixers. The solution was Green Griffin who produced a case of Red Bull, and we drank Vodka and Whiskey and Red Bull, going through about 13 bottles between not many of us (while watching Skin and Bones… once again good times). Unbelievably I was able to sleep when it came to that hours later.
Sunday was uneventful, aside from the NBA Saturday. Again it is an overrated night, but always fun to see NBA players wearing their suits, and their reactions to what is happening. It was fun to see Deron Williams and Chris Paul take the skills challenge seriously, and their rivalry. It was fun to see the 3 point shoot out, and see Chris Bosh look legitimately excited to see Jason Kapono, I was surprised that he even knew who he was and that he was paying attention to the event, do you think they hang out? does Chris Bosh have to hang out with with Jason Kapono because there are no other Black people in Toronto?
Finally the Slam Dunk contest. Normally I think that the Slam Dunk contest is a little overrated, but this year, with Rudy Gay asking for dunks on You Tube, Dwight Howard not getting respect last year, Gerald Green returning from last years great performance, and Jamario Moon playing this whole year trying to prove he should have been in the NBA all along. I thought Moon’s first dunk was awesome, and Rudy Gay’s Dunk throwing the ball off the back support was great and underrated, but Green and Howard took it to another level, If there were scores in the second round, Howard could have scored 200, they were all amazing, original, and fun. Greens shoeless dunk was great, as was the Birthday Cake dunk. It was the greatest Dunk contest ever.
The weekend finished watching Crank on Sky. Now I don’t want to say that the overall quality of movies has decreased over the years, but Sunday night used to be a night where there would be a decent movie on. Crank is a terrible movie. Jason Statham who was once a good actor, and was in great movies, Lock Stock and Snatch, is now reduced to making movies like this and The Transporter II. Even though the Transporter should never have been made, the Transporter II is even worse, it also has the biggest stretch in movie history. At one stage there is a bomb on the bottom of his car, the solution is the jump the car flipping it over under a crane, so the bomb gets hooked on the hook of the crane, and unhooks the bomb, while the car continues to rotate landing on its wheels, and driving away… If there is ever a Transporter III I may have to kill someone.
Now all I have to look forward to is next weekends Boat Trip… wait that will be awesome.
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